For Your Height Only-Movie Review

For Your Height Only Film Review

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For Your Height Only

Dir: Eddie Nicart
Philippines 1979
87 mins. 40 secs.
(oop DVD from Simitar)


Every once and a while a movie comes along so outlandish that it begs for cult status and there is none more deserving of a rediscovery than "For Your Height Only".

In Manila a crime syndicate led by Mr. Giant is determined to conquer the world and their first step is to kidnap the visiting Dr. Van Kohler. He is the inventor of the N bomb and they want his formula. To help finance their plans they run prostitutes, kidnap rich businessmen, smuggle drugs in loaves of bread ("There's a lotta dough in this dough.") and "cover every sandbox and kindergarten" for customers.

Their quest for world dominance seems inevitable until we are introduced to secret agent 00. He's a weapons expert, a kung fu master, a ladies man and he's only three feet tall! Played by Filipino Weng Weng, 00 is the most outrageous leading man ever to grace the silver screen. He slides between legs, uses an umbrella to do a Mary Poppins from the fifteenth floor and leaves women swooning. He comes equip with the coolest gadgets: a pendant communicator, a ring that detects poison, an Oddjob hat and glasses that can see through clothing. Aided by Lola, a reluctant hooker who gets "shot at once or twice a week" and Irma an undercover agent, the squabby 00 is soon ruining the gangs plans. He breaks up a drug party where some thugs inhale joints up their nose, and then uses his miniature jetpack to fly to Hidden Island where Mr. Giant is hiding his captives.

Although strictly a one joke film "F.Y.H.O. keeps your interest with a never-ending supply of absurd one liners and slapstick humor. One henchman does a James Cagney, "You try any tricks and you get blasted, see." and Weng Weng changes leisure suits every scene. Certainly not for those with a politically correct attitude it ranks behind only Sam Newfield's "The Terror of Tiny Town" in the annals of midget movies and should be sought out by all lovers of "bad film".

Greg Sonier


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